The Moment My Daughter Taught Me True Success

A few weeks ago, my 5-year-old daughter made me realize I’d let career success become my life’s focus —until she challenged it.

Here’s what happened: After dinner, as I instinctively opened my laptop to check up on work, she asked, ‘Why are you working?’ My answer—money to pays for our home, food, toys— this only deepened her curiosity when she repeated, ‘why?’ My answer— we need money to trade for things we need, I work to trade my time for money, and the money is used to trade for the toys you play. She nodded with some confusion and asked, `Can you come play with me?’ This made me pause. I closed my laptop and said ‘Okay honey, I’m coming’ to her delight.

The Pressure Trap

Tech professionals are taught to equate success with promotions, titles, and salary growth. But this mindset often leaves little room for other areas of life—until we realize:

  • We trade evenings, weekends, and milestones for ‘career progress’ that never feels enough.
  • Our time is the most precious resource, and we need to be conscious of the opportunity cost

Redefining Success

Intentionally blend what’s important to you into your definition of success. For me, that’s family, health, and financial security.

  • Prioritize hours with loved ones. For example, I now make it a ritual to pick up my kids from after-school care early on Fridays
  • Prioritize personal health. For example, I now make it a habit to go to the gym 2-3 times a week and do at least 15 mins of cardio per day. I want to have a long health span so I can see my kids grow up and play with my grandchildren.
  • Shift my mindset from ‘maximize income’ to ‘earn enough to live securely while being present.’

Closing

Your daughter won’t remember the promotion you missed… but she’ll never forget you. Let’s build a life that honours what truly matters to you.